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Name: Jay
Age: 20
Recommended by: Heather; lovestyle.

| WHO ARE YOU |

01.) What are your goals in life? Probably to avoid ever having to answer this question. I can seem very directionless and unfocussed, but it's because I have short-term goals rather than one long-term one. My goals at the start of this year were to start living for myself, to go to Barcelona - somewhere I've wanted to go for years - and write more. I've started living for myself, doing what I want to do, when I want to do it rather than being told who, what, where, when and why; I went to Barcelona in March even though the people I was supposed to be going with pulled out, and I met a friend I've been talking to online for years; and I've written more in seven months than I did the entirety of last year.

My goals develop and grow as I do. I may not look as though I have a direction, but it's because I'm exploring possibilities. My long term goal probably has something to do with motorsport and travel.

02.) What do you care about most? This is probably not a very common thing to be admitted to - but the thing I care about most is myself. The way I see it is that if I don't put myself first and don't care about myself, and nobody else is going to, then I may as well not be here. I can change my own actions and thoughts, but I cannot do anything but discuss actions and thoughts with anyone else, so I can't affect them or anything in particular in their lives.

This probably warrants a bit more explaining. There are a few in my life I say that I'd take a bullet for, and I would if I had to, but I'm more than likely going to get everyone - including myself - out of the way of the speeding bullet. I'm a risk taker, but I'm not completely dense.

03.) What is one thing you would change about the world today? I don't know. If I eradicated idiots, would that make stupidity stop? No, it probably wouldn't - there'd just be a higher-functioning level of stupid. If I eradicated prejudice, would that get rid of hate? No, it probably wouldn't - it'd just breed hatred of hatred and fear of fear, thereby defeating the entire purpose, and if it didn't do that, it'd wipe out most of the planet - from people who hate spiders to people who discriminate against gay people. If I eradicated war, would that stop killing? No, and if it did we'd be in a bit of a pickle being as we're already struggling to feed the billions of mouths and create an equal society.

What would I change about the world? I'd make it bigger, but that'd probably make global warming a bigger issue and kill millions from the expanding of earth. I think perhaps I'd take away money, or decrease the value of it, put emphasis on trading. Even still, though, there are flaws with doing that, and I don't know how the world would go without money.

Part of me wants to say I'd wipe the entire planet out and let it start anew, see if we can get it right this time, but even then there are about a million and ten holes in that idea.

I'd eradicate lies. That's what I'd do, I think. Oh, there'd still be ways to twist the truth, or omit information, but it'd be an interesting thing to see how things fared if politicians told the truth. I think eradicating lies would take care of a lot of the other issues in the world - needless wealth, needless hate, needless killing.

04.) Is there anything in your life that you regret? I try not to live with regret. It's not healthy, and it doesn't help. I've heard justification for it being something akin to "without regret, you wouldn't learn", which is a big steaming pile - you can learn from the past by observation; you don't need to die to know it would sort of suck to not be alive anymore, do you? Well, then.

05.) Describe your top positive characteristics. I'm terrible at listing the best and worst things about me, so I'm going to lift stuff from my Personality Type and expand upon the ones I particularly agree with (I'm an ENTP/ENFP, if you're interested):

I'm adaptable: I learn best when I'm thrown in at the deep end and I work best under pressure. I can pigeon-hole with the best of them and turn most situations to my advantage; as mentioned, I'm a writer, so I can usually talk my way out of - or into - most situations. I'm fairly intuitive and rely on my gut, so I'm quick to get a feel for things and grasp my bearings.

I'm personable: I get on with anyone and everyone; I do like spending time with people and I can generally look past annoying nuances unless it amounts to genuine stupidity (imho, lol). I'm pleasant to everyone and generally don't have a bad word to say about anyone.

I'm passionate: I will fight my corner to the bitter end and occasionally I do switch sides just to gain a better perspective of the overall argument. This probably goes hand-in-hand with the fact I'm enthusiastic about everything, so I can get very impassioned about things I've known about for a month (though you can be sure I know stupendous amounts of useless trivia about the subject in hand; I don't like being wrong).

I'm curious: This goes with what was said above - if I'm going to have an argument, I'm going to win it. I look things up and spend far too much time on the internet looking up facts. I like to be in the know about everything, which is why I'd say I'm more curious than knowledgeable - I don't like to think I know everything, and you'll more than likely hear me saying exactly the opposite - that I know nothing. I have a curious mind - I like to know things, find out things, then move on to something else.

I'm motivational: This is something that's stuck with me since I was in my third year of high school. Essentially, I was in a class I excelled at (Graphic Communication; technical drawings and diagrams, if you want to know) with a couple of girls who only took it because they thought it was a skive. Our teacher wasn't the most, uh, dedicated, so I sort of began teaching them and showing them how to do certain perspective drawings, helping out when I was finished my own work. The only thing I didn't do was do their actual work for them - I just showed them how. It got to parent-teacher evening and my teacher waxed lyrical about me to my parents about how I'd been the one who'd ~inspired these girls to pass (they were set for straight fails before I intervened). It's a description I like to reiterate to anyone who'll listen, all the while pretending it has nothing to do with my ego.

06.) Describe your top negative characteristics. Flaws? Pah!

...yeah, okay.

I'm over-critical: BANE OF MY LIFE, let me tell you. I've a natural predisposition for being over critical of both myself and others. For me, it's because I'm a perfectionist and striving to reach perfection is a bit difficult, being as there's probably no such thing as perfect (though I'm usually the first to argue that things are already perfect and it's a state of mind more than a state of being) so naturally, I do tend to fall short of the mark and berate myself quite a bit. For others, I can get irritated and frustrated that some people aren't as up-to-par as I am (ego! ego! ego!), so if someone attempts to make something I view as a stupid argument against me, I do get a bit irritable (though, as above, I'm usually willing to look past it).

I'm manipulative: It's not usually a conscious decision to manipulate someone to do something for me, and a lot of it is self-manipulation. I do usually get what I want. This sounds so omg-I'm-so-dark-and-mysterious, but that's not really how it goes. I can get a bit broody and motivation-less, like everyone else, and it's when I'm at my lowest that I'll automatically begin to manipulate things and people around me; I guess this is sort of the flip side of how adaptable I am.

I'm hot-headed: I get into arguments and debates quite a lot. Mostly, I'll keep myself to myself and have the argument be a mental raegfest, but sometimes words take over my brain and I'm talking too quick to think.

I'm obsessive: I wasn't sure whether to use obsessive or that I have an addictive personality for here, but obsessive probably covers both. I obsess over stupid things - I used to have to count everything I could see, I will wipe the toilet seat even if I wiped it after I used it last and I'm the only one to have done so, I will worry about having locked the door even though I've checked it four times and I can see the chain and deadbolt are in place. I will obsess over tiny details of any task if I get stressed and so I'll get nothing done. I also obsess in a different way; I obsess over things I like, and this is what I mean by having an addictive personality - I can't just buy one dress, I have to buy three; I can't just smoke one cigarette, I have to smoke the packet, etc etc.

I'm resistant to authority: Which is really dumb a lot of the time. I have a problem with anyone who tries to be authoritative over me and I resist any control but my own. It's gotten me into trouble more than once, and I do it automatically. It could be even as small as my mother, when I'm staying at home, telling me to clean my room - I won't do it when she tells me to; I'll wait until I want to and do it in my own time, meaning I'm then shooting myself in the foot by not just getting things over and done with. I'm an academic, but I hated school and refused to do well, which, in hindsight - baaaad idea.

07.) Pick a favorite quote and explain what it means to you. There are two. One is "Momento mori; tempus fugit" (Remember you're mortal; time flies) - this is something that's stuck with me for years and it's mostly because when I was a little younger, I had difficulty ever doing anything - I was always the one to say "there's plenty of time, I'll do it later", and granted, I am still Queen Procrastination when the shoe fits, so I found the quote above when I was going through an obsession with Latin (I found them separate - "momento mori" and "tempus fugit" - but smooshed them together for my own purposes) and it's something I've sort of stuck with, pushed myself with.

The other is "contra todo esto he peleado, y me no bajado" (I have fought against all of this, and I have not fallen [gone down, technically, but hey]), which is a direct quote from a racing driver I follow. He said it in 2009 and it has been plastered across journals and textbooks, notepads and my bedroom walls, since. It also kick-started my love for Spain and Spanish.

Describing what either of these two mean to me isn't particularly difficult, but it isn't easy, either. The simplest way to put it is that they are how I've lived my life for the past few years, and by doing so, I've begun to see light where I'd previously seen none. Words are my medium - I talk, I write, I read, and having a handful of words I can think about when I'm feeling like crap, it sort of helps. I don't know if that makes sense, but that's the best description I can offer. Words to describe words.

| DRACO DORMIENS NUNQUAM TITILLANDUS |

08.) Who is your favorite Harry Potter character? I don't know. I get asked this every time I'm discussing HP and I think my answer is different each time. I identify with at least one element of each and every character, I think, so there's something I like about all of them. I don't particularly like Umbridge or Pettigrew or Voldie, but I recognise the humanity in them all, and in that I recognise myself.

I don't think I have a favourite, in short, but I do like Ron, Ginny, Luna and Draco. And Blaise. Any HP RP I've ever been involved in, I've always been Draco, Blaise or Draco and Blaise, any time I've written for the fandom, Draco, Ginny or Draco and Ginny have been involved, and any time I've done an analysis piece, it's been about Ron or Luna. Ron is who I see most of myself in, in that I get myself into odd situations - ones that usually terrify the living daylights out of me, truth me told - but I always manage to pull through, and most of the time I have a serious foot-in-mouth problem where I talk before thinking and then end up face-palming. I'm not quite as reliant on other people as Ron can sometimes be.

I see myself in Luna because I like to think of myself as an out-of-the-box thinker. I like to ponder the what-ifs, explore theories that probably have no basis in fact. I don't quite go to the extent of sharing my theories and ideas if I'm not asked, however.

I see myself in Draco because the loyalties I have are ones I'll fight for, even if it goes against every instinct I have. I serve myself first and foremost, but family and friends come a very, very close second; I survive, then turn to make sure everyone else did, too. I don't know if I could abandon all of my principles, no matter how terrified, however.

I see myself in Ginny because girl is fierce. She's cast in a bad light in the fandom at times, but I do quite like her. I don't really take any stock in her fangirly obsession with Harry, but let's be real - all of us have had fangirly obsessions, haven't we? Ginny got what she wanted and took no prisoners doing so, and she's also a badass, which is always a plus.

And Blaise... I like Blaise because he's awesome, and we could sit for hours just having awesome conversations about how awesome we were.

09.) Least favorite? I don't know. I probably wouldn't get along very well with the usual suspects - aforementioned Voldie, Pettigrew or Umbridge - but doesn't everyone say them?

Possibly Bellatrix. She's an interesting character, but I'm not sure I get her or where she's coming from. When you look into the characters, you can follow the story of Voldemort and almost find a cold sort of logic in the ways in which he went about what he did and how he did it, but with Bella... there's nothing. No logic, nothing - just greed and megalomania, a twisted desire to be used, and that's... I don't know, it's weakness, in my eyes. I see her as a character with no self-worth for someone who attempts to appear so self-important - she needs gratification from Voldie before she does anything. I can see glimmers here and there of aspects I understand, like desire to be elevated to a position of power and trust, but beyond that, I'm not sure...

10.) Who would you have been friends with at Hogwarts? The people I mentioned in my rambly response to question eight, as well as probably Hermione and Harry. The reason I didn't mention those two above is that Hermione, whilst she pretty badass, can seem very narrow and at times, insufferable - these traits do not a favourite character make, though I'd love to be her friend because we could debate for hours.

And Harry... Harry annoyed me up until recently, for reasons inexplicable other than he was extraordinarily self-important and a bit of a douche for most of the books. I can identify with him, as main characters are designed to be identified with, but I still don't think it's possible for him to ever be my favourite character, whereas we could be quite good friends because I'd at least be able to smack him upside the head.

11.) What would you most enjoy about your time at Hogwarts? Everything. EVERYTHING. Magically appearing food, goddamn! Quidditch! EXPLORING THINGS! Meeting other people, finding out more about magic and how it can be used.

12.) Describe each of the four houses as you see them:

Gryffindor: Gryffindors are the warriors; they're the ones throwing themselves into the action, fighting for what they believe is right, adhering to their own moral codes.

Hufflepuff: Hufflepuffs are the peacemakers; they're taking in all sides of the argument and finding compromise, attempting to find harmony in discord.

Ravenclaw: Ravenclaws are the strategists; they're the ones working out what's going to be the best way of doing things, developing the plan of action and figuring out which is the best way to go forward.

Slytherin: Slytherins are the generals; they're the ones pulling the strings and making things happen, talking to the right people and oiling the hinges to make the machine work.


13.) Which house do you feel the least affinity for? I don't really know. There are elements of all four houses I do and don't identify with. Perhaps Hufflepuff, being as I'm far too self-centred and I generally don't care enough - my own needs will always come before those of another.
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